The Tale Of Expectations

Recently, i’ve come across this school of thought around expectations which I find pretty unrealistic. The idea states that one must have little or no expectation to remain happy. While I completely agree to unrealistic expectations from unknown parties leave us vulnerable, I do not believe the same can be followed in places of love & nurture. Why ? I will try to explain it here. Please Note : It is an abstract thought, so forgive me if I am unable to make my point here. Remember, I will only put forward a perspective (being completely aware of the fact that there are multiple more perspective out there and I equally respect all). Every point describing love is associated with all kinds of love including ‘romantic’, ‘family’, ‘friends’, ‘pets’ etc. Love is selfless. Understood. It must not have expectations. ..... ummm why? Scenario 1 : You have a job. You don’t perform (expectation). You are fired. Fair deal ! If in the scenario the numbers are unreal or some other, there may be a logical explanation. The expectation gap handling is a major skill. Scenario 2 : You wake up in the hostel room on your birthday. Your best friend meets you and forgets to wish (expectation). You’re a little upset. He/she probably read your face and makes up. Expectations are majorly linked to how our minds process. Not having expectations can be very unrealistic. ‘No Expectation’ is ironically an expectation in itself. We have expectations, dreams, passion, uncertainty - these are human traits. They make us us. I do believe the cause of disappointment here is not ‘expectation’ rather it is ‘expectation mismatch’. These are two different things. Expectations being an unconscious build up in our brains, we neglect to understand it takes a different shape in everyone’s mind. Some are flexible while some aren’t. So the real skill needed is not ‘expectation neglect’ but ‘expectation gap handling’. Deduction : Like every other thing on earth, love is earned too. Sometimes we take it for granted and it is our duty to manage things as well as possible. We might fail but we will know a home to go back to. Love might be selfless but it is still a 2 way journey. It is okay to expect to be understood in silence sometimes, it is okay to expect to be held in times of helplessness sometimes, it is okay to be oneself. It is not okay to just expect, one must make sure their loved ones feel the same form of security and comfort in their presence. This is how bonds grow ! So, I think, expectations are great. What one needs to know is how to handle the differences and there will be plenty. A deep root analysis is a start. Another article on this one. Feedback : Your thoughts might be different from mine. Do tell me in the comments below. What are your thoughts on expectations ? Picture : That mom and me, just a happy pic :) Didn’t I say love has many different meanings? Can you spot some in our smiles ?