A letter to the loved one

It's been a while,
From being strangers to friends,
And to being strangers again,
I've held on,
Maybe you've moved on;

Back in those days of innocence,
I valued you no less,
But I cried the day I let you go,
And as hard as it could be,
I knew it was the right thing for you,
For if I asked and you stayed,
I'd have deviced a lifetime of despair,
I was nothing you deserved,
And I had nothing to offer back then,
So I let you go,
And I would do it again;

And after all this time,
While I was battling for my promises,
Trying to solve the complexities in my life,
I realised something deeper,
I realised I could never really let you go,
I let myself believe otherwise,
But it remained with me,
Like a horcrux within myself;

While I searched for the formula of love,
I had something much dearer that I had lost,
Once again, I missed,
I missed not on the opportunity,
I missed realising how strong you were,
How telling you everything would have saved us from one another,
I realised you were my strength,
You were my connection to sanity,
You were my link to rationalism,
To love & to life,
I have known this ever since,
I have loved you thus;

I look for forgiveness,
I haven't done much,
Except I will write,
I will write a book for our souls;

With love,
To the beloved best friend