The relentless ramble (part1)

Going for long drives,
May sound familiar to you,
Not me with you,
You were out there,
All smiles doing me a favour,
Never asking for anything in return,
Being the selfless person,
You can only dream of,
There you are like a ray of hope,
Into an unwanted woman's life;

You know it all,
How to treat a lady,
How to be a friend,
How to let trust seep in,
And yet you stay,
Unlike most other men,
Who would seek competition,
Who might want to have Miranda Kerr instead;

All of this with a little curve up your lips,
I think I fall for it everytime,
Even though I am trying to resist,
After years I think you make me feel,
That you may not leave,
But the scars are deep,
And love hidden much within,
I'm hoping you wouldn't leave,
Because I'd be okay with that,
But Never too well though,
That's the problem with hope,
Once you have it,
You cannot part,
Once you are loved,
One can't be unloved,
Once you stay,
It feels like eternity,
And each time I am jolted out of the horrible dream,
Whispering in my ears how things go crashing down and how I must weep.

And where should I stop,
The fact that you have many an accolade,
Solely dedicated to the purpose of human welfare,
So thorough a gentleman you make,
I am surprised you even exist today,
And I were so lucky to have your acquaintance;

Yes, the world seems to love me,
They can cross their hearts for it,
But ask them this,
Where do I find solace in,
Would they know,
You might think that is easy,
But believe me,
I've known the virtual world much too long,
It promises without the essence,
It cares not too much of 'care',
It moves on like a hopeless kid,
And I find the purpose of their lives undone, unearthed,
I wish I could help,
But one must start with one self;

Oh should I listen to the beat again,
The foolish heart that skips it again,
I can hear its tattered sound,
For long it hasn't been sound,
It's waited way too long,
And time has torn it down,
It no longer chimes like youth would have it tried,
It waits still in a cage within,
That's the thing with hope,
Once you have it,
You cannot part;

I ramble away like a lunatic,
You may pass away like any other time,
I wouldn't notice,
I promise....

The Old Love

This is something we all hate. The power lost love can have on us. How vulnerable we get. If it were bad, you can move on. If it wasn't bad, you remain suspended in a bubble of memory lane. Strangely, nothing jolts you back to reality.

If I look back,
It's been 5 years,
Yes, 5 long years,
Half of it, I tried to wrap my head around what was happening,
The rest I tried all things to hate you, then love you, then just be a stoic,
But when it comes to love that felt so real,
You have to agree,
It's a part of you,
A part that goes down to the grave.

The regret lies in the lies,
The lies I said to myself,
The lies you would have told yourself,
The lies our eyes said to one another,
And the lies we will tell one another,
If we do bump into each other,
How wonderful our lives are apart and forgotten,
While deep within we'll always agree,
What we had was real,
How bad can you fake it,
I can't believe to this level,
Or maybe I don't want to,
I'll go with the sixth sense,
Because that's all that helps me live,
Helps me think there's good,
However small that may be.

I sometimes got so jumpy,
I almost spoke my mind,
I didn't though,
And I regret that,
Lost the time that was ours,
It isin't the biggest of regrets,
Because saying it wasn't me,
And I think we knew that always,
However, I'd always like to tell you,
How I never wanted to hurt you,
That I was always trusting of you,
That I never left,
And never will,
And I will possibly never have the courage to say it ever again,
But then again I do surprise myself sometimes,
Getting jittery all after 5 years is a surprise I believe.