The Old Love

This is something we all hate. The power lost love can have on us. How vulnerable we get. If it were bad, you can move on. If it wasn't bad, you remain suspended in a bubble of memory lane. Strangely, nothing jolts you back to reality.

If I look back,
It's been 5 years,
Yes, 5 long years,
Half of it, I tried to wrap my head around what was happening,
The rest I tried all things to hate you, then love you, then just be a stoic,
But when it comes to love that felt so real,
You have to agree,
It's a part of you,
A part that goes down to the grave.

The regret lies in the lies,
The lies I said to myself,
The lies you would have told yourself,
The lies our eyes said to one another,
And the lies we will tell one another,
If we do bump into each other,
How wonderful our lives are apart and forgotten,
While deep within we'll always agree,
What we had was real,
How bad can you fake it,
I can't believe to this level,
Or maybe I don't want to,
I'll go with the sixth sense,
Because that's all that helps me live,
Helps me think there's good,
However small that may be.

I sometimes got so jumpy,
I almost spoke my mind,
I didn't though,
And I regret that,
Lost the time that was ours,
It isin't the biggest of regrets,
Because saying it wasn't me,
And I think we knew that always,
However, I'd always like to tell you,
How I never wanted to hurt you,
That I was always trusting of you,
That I never left,
And never will,
And I will possibly never have the courage to say it ever again,
But then again I do surprise myself sometimes,
Getting jittery all after 5 years is a surprise I believe.