Why of What You Like? (Tread psychology)

Mostly there are things we do or say and we never know why. Why is it we like reading stories in Harvard, Oxford, MIT, HMS, IIT etc? Why do we like stories centering Italy, Brazil, Switzerland, British Columbia etc?

If you have 2 books- 1. ordinary story of  a man in Calcutta   2. ordinary story of a man in MIT , which one would you pick? Mostly, the second, right?

Biased Dreams?

The fact that we all dream and they are not cheap, they are extra-ordinary and moderately society driven. Why would you think you want to be in Harvard when you want to be an author? Most likely in the young age, you didn't want it because of its rank but because it was famous(Circulated as a brand in your social circle). You were running behind the fame and honor it beheld, not quite your destination. We like not just reading the extra ordinary man's book but also associate with it highly. We start feeling and that is our favorite book.

Stranger Associations?

We also disagree and take the other book. But the feeling is again of association. Maybe like the ordinary man, you failed. You feel this guy is like you. Just like '5 point someone' is the book of every someone except the few toppers.We associate.

'Logic is but Emotion, Emotion is just another logic' 

In a rational world it happens every moment and yet we remain bewildered. Today we could throw some light on it. You might agree or disagree with me. Which ever it is do discuss for I am in dilemma.

Love passionate?

Why do you connect with this girlfriend more than any other? -It probably has no words. That is where it starts, we don't try to put it in words. In fact a few things are humanly without logic and words. Yet this is logical ! You probably feel more like passionate love for this person because you can associate more. This association has been through either instances of visit or even similar life experience. So your sudden lady love might not be sudden, it was an impact of society and life. However you will remain associating better because this person will not love you for anyother thing but because she can see herself/someone special in you. Sounds similar to ladies finding father figure in bf s?

Why do men not want long term relationships? -I know women are pounding over this question most of the times. Well, its not just with men. It so happens our society gives the man a better chance to verbally choose. Mind it the girl has a subtle way of doing so. She might come out as lovable to someone she likes and it is so psychological that one hardly notices. Therefore men do account for more not wanting long relationships -numerically,yes!

In your college did girls not ponder over guys who changed girls like 't-shirt' and ofcourse he changed his t-shirts if not boxers? So in society this is 'cool'. Now on the other hand, a similar girl would be a 'slut'? The constant brushing of our minds in the wrong direction even if its pretence can cause us to choose partners we don't even want. So a relationship which is built to be 'cool' or some other weird purpose, how can you expect that to be committed for? The truth is- once wanted commitment, the person shakes up thinks whether the description/compatibility he/she would desire is there in the present relationship. Since the parameters of choosing the partner has more been biased by society and friends he/she suddenly realizes this is not what he wants. Many still don't realize. This leads to either breakup or bad marriage.


Love VS Arranged? Not Again!

The very fact that arranged marriages have been pledged to be more successful than love marriages is not the whole picture. The scenarios in both widely vary. The successful arranged marriage either date much earlier or even today. The rate is bound to vary. Not only did interaction amongst youth increase, it is their immature relationship status which creates blunders. Many don't mind blunders, which is okay but the stats are based on them. Even arranged marriages today may be far more successful. Obviously, the guy has tried and tested for around 25 years. On failure of finding the right match or after plenty betrayals has signed up for a arranged match. Till then he has a perfect image of what he wants in his partner and he then takes a conscious decision of choosing his partner. Whenever we take a decision by ourselves even if it goes wrong, we are ready to mend it. On the other hand, the fact in an immature love remains you are conscious you didn't explore the arranged options + you are not quite adaptable to mending. Which means love marriages consciously done should be successful, which they are. Like say SRK, Chetan Bhagat- they decided for themselves, consciously willing to pay a price!

So are there things we cannot answer? Maybe or maybe not.

A note: Remember you can only love another if you love yourself. It takes a lot to love yourself. You have to be amazing to truely love yourself. Donot let anyone ever let you feel you need someone. You need noone. You are not a baby anymore. But yes, you might be happier with someone who can help you grow and achieve your dreams. The right person will never let you down, will respect you and never hurt your feelings even if its prejudiced. Either ways you have to be open to adapt,change and live. However never compromise. For the right person will never want so. And since you love yourself, you will never let yourself do so. Adjustments are different. Expect, you are human! Everyone expects and there is nothing wrong in it. But if your 6th sense ever tells you 'this is not right' believe it. Staying alone is not miserable because you are awesome. Society will pressurize you. But you have to stay put. Decide on what you want. And wait for that or look for that. Once your sure, go ahead. You will have a happy marriage. But if you are not sure don't. There are far worse things than having to stay alone.